A Blessing to Help Me Moving Forward

My basement is coming along!

I asked Kamiko if he would give me a blessing since my anxiety is pretty high. I'm not sleeping well and I keep running my to-do list and my budget through my mind. It's pretty bad. I am trying use self-talk to remind myself that things will work out. That I'll get my to-do list done. That my finances are in a great place. Anxiety still gets me and it can be really hard. Here's what's on my mind:

The cost of my basement remodel

The cost of our upcoming DisneyWorld trip

The UAFCS conference in September

Supervising interns

Communicating with mentor teachers

The sisters to whom I minister

No sisters reach out to me as my ministers - just a text would mean the world

My busy weekend schedule in August and September

Updating my vita

Getting courses ready for fall

How to juggle student needs and course rigor

Ok, that's depressing, but it's real. It's real. It's real. 

Kamiko and Bekki came over today before going to the Brau's for dinner. We had a great visit and talked about our upcoming trip to DisneyWorld and our September trip to Arkansas to see BYU play UARK. Then Kamiko gave me a very sweet blessing. The message that Heavenly Father had for me was very unexpected. Here's what I remember:

1. There really isn't anything Heavenly Father can do to help my situation.

2. Heavenly Father is aware of my strengths and of my students' weaknesses.

3. I need to leave work at work.

4. I can teach my students how to cook, but it is not my job to teach them life lessons. God will teach them. 

5. Take time to take care of myself. 

6. Taking care of myself will allow me to better help others, but I have to focus on myself right now.

7. Shift the focus that I have normally put on my students to myself and other worthwhile things.  

8. I might not have as close of relationships with my students, but it's ok. 

9. Heavenly Father is aware of me.

Whoa! I was so surprised. I don't quite know what this will look like, but I do think it looks like not hyper-focusing on work and on my students. I think it looks like taking care of my mental health over worrying about syllabus and class policies. We'll see. I initially said "Screw the students." Kamiko basically said, "Take care of yourself, mom. I almost said 'treat yourself.'"

I'm ready to see what this means. I think I'll write a note on my whiteboard to remind myself. 

July meant some visitors. It has been fun. Karen came into town to bring Elle to a golf camp. Allie came into town for a few days around the 4th of July. Sarah and Cameron were also here for the 4th. Derek and Rachel and kids were here, too. There was a bit of overlap and we had a blast. We borrowed the Hjorth's canopy and went to Tibble Fork up American Fork Canyon on July 3rd. Evidently the water was COLD. I wouldn't know. I didn't go in. 

4th of July BBQ at Allison's house with Karen

Working a bit this summer

My new dress from Burano. On my way to a wedding reception in American Fork

Karen, Allie, and I went on a run while Karen and Allie were in town

Hunters were in town and we had dinner. Melia, Rose, me, Grandma, Milo, and Charlie. Back row: Kamiko, grandpa, Derek, Rachel

Audrey, Allison, and I went to the Scera Shell to see Mary Poppins. One of my colleagues was in it. We had a blast and Audrey really liked it. 

Lunch with dad, Karen, me, and mom

Cousins at Tibble Fork: Mac, Allison, me, Sarah, Audrey, Mel, Allie. I love them all!

Movie day! Kamiko cracked me up with his Indiana Jones themed outfit. The movie was fun. I love movies and I love movies with my son.